Nerves

We find out our test results tonight. I'm trying not to get my hopes up. Going strictly off of my test results, I have no chance. I'm still struggling with endurance, and I have no speed. My hip checks need some work, particularly on my right side where I'm still struggling to even be able to balance my weight on my right ankle. I feel like I did a good job on shoulder and drag blocks, but I don't know. Maybe what felt right to me wasn't actually right. My positional blocking still needs some work. That's one area that I've really struggled with. I used to go to Barber Park to try to work on stuff like that with Shae, but right after I got back up on skates, they closed the rink at Barber Park. I think it re-opened this weekend, but it's a little late now.

Whether or not we make the league is decided by a vote. The league members review our test results, attendance, participation in events, attitude, etc. My test results aren't great, but I've fulfilled my event requirements, maintained a good attitude at practice, and attended all but one practice (though most of them don't actually count for shit due to being off-skates.)

Best case scenario? I still have a lot of practice time to make up due to being out so much. Maybe I'll make it up and they'll decide on my status at that point.

Worst case scenario? Not only do I not make it, but I get told that I'm done, pack it up and go home. I mean, it's my second recruitment. I was already an Honorary and didn't really improve. This could be it for me.

Have I ever mentioned that I'm a bit of a pessimist? 'cause I am.