I could kick myself for practice last night. I'm really struggling right now. My Monday physical therapist is a big, beefy guy. He's absolutely wonderful, really pushes me hard each time I'm there. I love going to him because no matter what, he keeps me going. Now that my ankle is healing up a bit, I've been noticing pain in my plantar fascia. Last week, my Thursday therapist gave me stretches to do and did an ultrasound on it. This week, my Monday therapist spent about five minutes rubbing out the scar tissue. He's super strong and it *hurt*. It was quite honestly some of the worst pain I've ever felt in my life, even worse than when they were rubbing out the scar tissue in my ankle. I cried a little for the first time whole process. So I went into practice on Monday still sore from that.
Being in derby stance for long periods of time hurts.
Putting weight on my leg hurts.
Crossovers hurt.
Sticky skate hurts.
Endurance exercises hurt.
Do you see a trend here? =/
Physical therapy helped me out in so many ways. Ever since I got back onto skates after starting PT, crossovers are a million times easier. Before, since my ankle turned outwards naturally, I tripped over my own feet or really had to concentrate to force my ankle to go in the right direction. Now I just put my foot over the other like it's no big deal. If you would have told me I could do that a few months ago, I would have laughed in your face. With just standard skating, I'm feeling a lot more confident than I was before.
On days like yesterday though, I almost wish I had never bothered. My bank account is depressingly low. I'm losing hours at work because I'm always at physical therapy. I'm missing opportunities for overtime because I have appointments with the doctor or physical therapist. The first week after I started, I was allowed to skate but instantly regretted it. I was in so much pain that week and gave a poor performance on the rink. It was like the whole thing made me suck harder. Last week, I felt great, but this week... ow. I almost didn't even go into work today because my ankle hurt so bad. And while I'm skating with more confidence, I'm doing certain skills (such as jumping) with even less confidence (which is really saying something considering I've always been a nervous jumper.) I'm already behind everyone else so I don't want to sit out anymore and, being that this is my second recruitment, I don't want to quit and wait to try for round 3. But *guh*, if I don't get my act together, I'm not going to make it. Again.
On a more positive note, if I do make it into the league, I've already spoken with Spikey about ordering some Antiks. The doctor wants me to use a high topped boot to try to protect my ankles from twisting, plus my right foot is smaller than the left, so hopefully upgraded skates will help. They're a bit out of my price range, but they're less expensive than a month of physical therapy copays, so it all balances out in the end, I think. I also think I'll end up with a bruise on my hip soon from blocking practice.
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